Marianne & Quadir

Marianne is a 28 year old graduate of Cornell, the youngest of four children, and works in the pharmaceutical industry. Quadir is an eight year old boy who lives with his mother in Trenton. They were matched by BBBS in 2007.

Did you have in your background a non-family member who was important to your development, like a Big Brother or Big Sister?

Well, I came to understand the importance of others’ help through my family’s emigration from Saigon. My father died young; my family was sponsored by a Catholic organization who welcomed us to Massachusetts. I think of their help with deep gratitude. And my mother raised us as a single mother; her struggle to keep our family together helps me appreciate issues that Quadir’s mom faces. My mother is an incredible person and one of the most significant influences in my life. My siblings and I are merely extensions of her life's success.

Who introduced you to BBBS?

I’ve wanted to be a Big Sister since college. Actually, as work-study when I was in Ithaca, I participated in recruitment and support for the BBBS high school mentoring program there. And I was aware of the program because my brother had a Big Brother when he was younger.

Why did you think mentoring a young person was something you’d like to do?

It just seemed logical, in keeping with what I’ve learned in life. I know from personal experience how the interest of others, freely given, can be a great influence in a child’s life. I like children and wanted to give back in this way.

Is the youngster you are currently matched with your first?

Yes, and I feel fortunate: Quadir is such a great kid!

What sort of experiences have you shared with your Little, from the most routine to the most unusual?

Well, he is very young, and I think it’s important to share everyday, common experiences like riding in a car, shopping, handling money, learning that nothing’s free. We go bowling and have been to Chuck E Cheese; he’s learning to cook and we’ve done a barbeque together. And though at first he was a little frightened, now he’s learned to play with my dogs, Boo and Ginger.

How often do you get together?

It used to be just once a month, but now it’s more like two or three times a month.

What gives you the greatest satisfaction/pleasure about your relationship with your young person?

Well, he humbles me, he grounds me. He seems so happy and innocent, and I enjoy his affection, his hugs.

How do you think your Little would answer that question?

I think he’d say that we have fun together, because we do!

Interview, April 2009